By Lucy Jane Drummond
It took me ages to write this article. Not because I couldn’t be bothered or because I was too busy, but because I really, really want to do the subject justice. You see, writing about the woes of Westminster or the happenings of Holyrood might be just as vexing as the next issue, but writing about something as emotive, as important and as taboo as rape is something that has caused me a bit of a headache.
Even as Women’s Officer in our Union, an empowered and vocal feminist, writing about something that’s so frequently misunderstood and misrepresented by so many, whilst remaining sensitive to the feelings of the people who may have been deeply affected by what I’m going to discuss, is no mean feat. To be honest, it would take more than one article to do the subject justice, but I really want to try to set the record straight. There’s one fundamental truth to always remember when talking about rape – it is never the fault of the victim and always the fault of the rapist.
Sadly, this truth is often forgotten by the media, by the police or even by average Joe at the pub. Whether intentional or otherwise, there exists a culture of victim blaming in our society. “Did you see how short her skirt was? She was totally asking for it.” In some cases, the victim can even internalise feelings of blame, which is especially catastrophic to their health and well-being. Archaic and frankly insulting attitudes that place the blame on the shoulders of the victim aren’t just hurting others, but are making rape acceptable by taking the responsibility away from the rapists.
Perhaps the most recent high profile incident of victim blaming and shaming was the Ched Evans case. Premiership footballer Ched Evans was found guilty of raping a woman in a hotel room and consequently sentenced to five years in prison. However, while justice had been served and Evans was incarcerated for his crime, the internet and, in particular, the Twittersphere, went into overdrive. Were these tweeters pleased that a man had been jailed for raping a woman? No. They were incensed that their football hero had been (rightly) convicted of a heinous crime, whilst naming and shaming the woman he had raped. In case you aren’t aware, it’s illegal to name a rape survivor, as this breaches the anonymity granted to them by the legal system.
The fact that the survivor of this crime was openly abused while Evans’ supporters bayed for his release, despite his being a convicted rapist, shows just how little society really knows or cares about rape and other crimes of sexual violence.
But what of sexual crimes in the student world? We’re frequently told how lucky we are to be at one of Europe’s most beautiful university campuses, and yes, visually, Stirling University’s campus certainly is pretty idyllic. Like all other universities and colleges in the UK, Stirling does its best to give its students a fantastic student experience that they’ll remember fondly upon graduation, but if you scratch the surface, the UK student experience might not be all smiles and sunshine. The ‘Hidden Marks’ report, carried out by the National Union of Students, highlights just how much of an impact sex crimes have on students today.
One in seven female students will experience sexual assault during their time as a student. More than four in ten students who had been the victim of serious sexual assault had told nobody about what had happened to them. The most common reason students gave for not reporting what had happened to them was that they didn’t feel it was serious enough to report.
The findings of the ‘Hidden Marks’ Report certainly makes for upsetting and shocking reading. Whilst speaking to some Stirling students about their own experiences and opinions on the issue, I met with a female student, who wishes to remain anonymous. Her words below are saddening, but she herself is brave and keen to speak out to help others.
“Rape and assault aren’t always violent, aggressive acts by those you perceive as ‘bad people’. You can know and love somebody who might do it. I have been raped several times by a past boyfriend, but it was never aggressive. At the time, I didn’t realise what he was doing was wrong, because he was my boyfriend. We loved each other, so in my mind, it didn’t seem like rape when it happened”.
This brings home perhaps the most important point of the issue – consent.
Despite many people having a “glamourised” version of what rape is in their heads, believing it to be the actions of a violent stranger in a dark alleyway, stranger rapes are actually in the minority. The majority of rapists are known to the victim, many are even their partners, as recalled above. It isn’t the situation that is the defining factor, it’s the absence of consent that makes it rape. Consent is not a continuous allowance either; simply because you consent to sexual intercourse with someone on one occasion, it doesn’t mean that you will or have to consent to it again. It is also something that can be withdrawn at the moment of intercourse if you decide that you don’t want to continue. It’s your right, your decision and your body.
There exists a culture of jokes and comments around the subject of rape and sexual violence that simply gets dismissed as “being a lad” or as “banter”. My own experience of this is unfortunately wide and varied, but perhaps the most memorable line used to sexually degrade me was “you’d make my cock look like a barber’s pole with that lipstick”.
I spoke to a male student, keen to figure out if I was the only one who felt as sickened and as outraged that such actions of sexual harassment are tolerated.
“Rape and sexual assault are widely regarded in today’s society as taboo subjects. However, what appals me is that even today the passing of derogatory comments and remarks are viewed as healthy ‘lad banter’,” said William Rennie, a law student at the University of Stirling.
“It is unacceptable that the general public are not educated enough to understand that such behaviour is perpetually insulting to women”.
I feel that more needs to be done to challenge the attitudes that continue to blame rape victims for their own rape and think that rape jokes are funny.
If you think about making a joke or comment about sex crimes or rape, just imagine the woman you’re saying it to as your own mother or sister. If you wouldn’t want someone to say it to them, don’t say it to someone else. Sexual intercourse without consent is rape – no always means no.
Nice to see in an article about rape by the person who is supposed to further gender equality within the university spoke about sexual assault and rape towards men.
Oh wait…nice one.
Hi Sean,
Since the recent high profile cases of rape in the news have all been around attacks against women (Assange and his subsequent defense by George Galloway & Tony Benn, etc) and given that rape is an OVERWHELMINGLY gendered crime, perpetrated by men against women; given that the NUS ‘Hidden Marks’ report was carried out by the NUS Women’s Campaign; given that I am elected to represent women as the Women’s Officer and given that I am a woman, one would surely expect me to write about this from the women’s perspective.
Having read the Sexual Offences Act (Scotland) 2009 many times, I am completely aware that men too are victims of rape and sexual violence, and nowhere in my article do I claim otherwise. Rape against anybody of any gender is disgusting, abhorrent and utterly unforgivable, but I cannot write about it from a male perspective, given that I am a woman. It would be completely wrong of me to even attempt to give any insight in that area; one simply cannot write about that with which they are not familiar. Whilst I can write about the women’s perspective on these crimes, it would be wrong of me to speak from the perspective of a man.
If, however, you wish to write an article about it, that would be really good. I wholeheartedly believe that it’s an issue that should be discussed more than it is, but like I have said, I am elected to represent women and can only speak about the women’s campaign in an official capacity.
Just as a side note about my official role and remit within our Students’ Union, as the Women’s Officer, I am elected:
• To coordinate and autonomously lead the Women’s’ Campaign on campus.
• To represent the views of women to the Union, University and other external bodies.
There is no mention of me actively promoting “gender equality”. I would like to also mention that by championing women’s rights and representation, I am promoting gender equality through women’s liberation. Fighting for equal rights and opportunities with men IS, by its very nature, fighting for gender equality.
Sadly, there is no such thing as gender equality in our society, but we can achieve it via women’s liberation.
The irony of there only being a women’s movement to promote equality is awesome.
I like that men aren’t discriminated against so we don’t need an equality movement.
Sean,
You seem to misunderstand the meaning of the women’s movement, what it represents and indeed, the reasons for its existence.
Firstly, we live in a world which is male dominated. That is fact. Men hold over 99% of the world’s property rights and over 80% of the world’s decision-making powers, while women do over two thirds of the world’s work, yet earn only 10% of the world’s income. To put it into a British context, only 16 of the FTSE 100 CEOs are women. In a university graduate context, it takes female graduates in the UK an average of half a decade longer than their male counterparts to pay off their student loans. This is a direct result of the gender pay gap, which despite being illegal, is still a reality in Britain today.
Secondly, these figures prove beyond doubt that men have the upper hand in society. I would therefore refute any claim that men somehow need representation and pose the question of how men can be liberated from themselves? Surely if you are lucky enough to be born with a penis, you aren’t at the automatic disadvantage that billions of women are?
Who do men want to be equal with? Themselves?
Also, when you talk about men being discriminated against, the most often example that’s cast up time and time again is the male nurse or the male hairdresser or any man who does a job that is thought of as “women’s work”. You’ll notice that the people causing the problem are other men: women are not the people laughing at male nurses for not being “macho” enough. As a direct result of the male oppression of women, there are distinct gender roles which exist in our world. Just as we are told that pink is for girls and blue is for boys, we are told that there are men’s jobs and women’s jobs. Since being a woman is automatically assumed as inferior (see the above facts and figures), anything construed as “women’s work” is automatically a lesser job than something deemed “men’s work”.
In short, if you liberate women from the oppression of men, thus enabling gender equality, you smash the ideas of gender roles and completely deconstruct the inverted discrimination against those men who are thought of as lesser either because of their job or because of their sexuality.
Patriarchy oppresses women and men. If you liberate women and make them equal with men, you fix the problem.
“You’ll notice that the people causing the problem are other men: women are not the people laughing at male nurses for not being “macho” enough”
Can I point out, as a male nurse, that myself and male colleagues have faced ridicule from women (and men as well, obviously). Just because someone is from a specific gender doesn’t mean they can’t make nasty comments with the intent of causing emotional harm.
I read your article and was really impressed until you made the seem sweeping generalisations others are guilty of.
Also, this debate is all very well and good, but the article was actually supposed to get people talking about women and the way that we’re often sexually degraded (more so than men in the student context). Instead we’ve become sidetracked on an issue which doesn’t particularly deal with the issues raised in the article.
In the interests of dealing specifically with the issues raised in the article and not issues you have with the women’s movement, I feel that it would perhaps be prudent to continue this discussion via a different medium. If you do want to continue this debate, I would happily do so via private message on Facebook, as I feel this discussion detracts from the intention of the initial article.
Hi Lucy, I just wanted to apologise for commenting on your article in way that took away from your article. I meant to do this a while ago but I’ll be honest I totally forgot. I stand by the things that I said and I disagree with you on a lot of things, however it was wrong of me to question you on something that was unrelated as that drew away from what was generally a good article.
I realise the way I went about this was wrong and what I really did was just take the first opportunity that arose to question you rather than just asking you directly. Like we have discussed previously making knee-jerk reactions is one of the problems of being human, I just hope I didn’t put you off writing for Brig again.
Sean Heron.
Hi Sean,
Thanks for your apology. I can assure you that I have not been discouraged from writing for Brig again! I’m glad that you appreciate what I said about kneejerk reactions – sometimes the things that make us most human are the things that cause us the most trouble!
Best wishes,
Lucy
You’ll never defeat me!